Oh My English!

Ok,I admit it! My english is not poor, but immensely deprived. It always makes me feel akward or blushed speaking to those who chinese used to call " the red hairs" or even to those who are borned in an English educated family. So it comes to the"er....ar.....ei..." problem as I always reluctantly need approximately five seconds searching for the right word when communicating with them.I even feel crushed and upset finding almost twenty vocabularies though reading a short article only. So I think I really think I need to spend my precious holiday to strive hard in English. It will then be easier for me along the journey in pursuing my dreams.